Love, lost and forgotten ?

Sumita's life has never been dull. She always kept herself busy with work, household chores or attending fascinating art classes. To top it all, Mainak has always been supportive. He never stopped her from taking any ventures, he is very proud of his wife.

Like, every other day, she came back from work, conjured a fine dish for dinner and sat down with her laptop.

No comments, no updates, nothing interesting on Facebook.

Sumita turned to Orkut. Maybe something interesting to see there, another one hour for Mainak to come home.

She kept visiting the profiles of her friends, smiling and commenting. She scrolled down the profile page of a friend and stopped. Her heart skipped a beat; she longingly looked at the profile picture. Sumita could feel the terrible pain swelling up. She knew she was doing something wrong, but still clicked on the profile. Sanjay's profile borrowed the entire screen of her laptop. She kept staring at the picture.

He hasnt changed a bit. His smile is still so innocent.

Without thinking twice, Sumita, touched the picture, as if, caressing his face and immediatly retracted.

Oh! What the hell am I doing? This is wrong. This was long time ago. How can I forget I am married and happy.

She thought, but never left the page. Like a school girl,she tried going through each link, photos, info, but she was denied access to these information.

Ofcourse, how foolish of me, I am not even in his friend list and that was my decision.

Sumita, looked at the clock, another 10 mins for Mainak to come. She went to her email account. Like a trance, she opened a new mail.

To: sanjaythephotographer@gmail.com....I still think it is a silly and self proclaimed address. Anyway, what do I write to him?

Sumita rested her head on the pillow and closed her eyes. It was a like flashback. Sumita and Sanjay were madly in love. They met at their workplace, but it was not love at first sight. It took Sanjay quite some time to woo Sumita into one date. Sumita was always ready to be loved, months away from a crappy relationship, she was definitely looking for the perfect one and Sanjay was not at all her choice. Being born in an upper middle class family that valued education and class, she never thought a simple commerce graduate like Sanjay can be her life partner or to be more precise the life son in law of her parents.
Nevertheless, Sanjay's attitude, his mannerism played tricks on Sumita and very soon she was fighting with her own emotions.

I cannot be with him, what will my folks say. Maybe when he proposes I will tell him. I have to, this cannot happen.

What happened was, a date in a Chinese shack, amazing evening, lots of laughter. Sumita thought about him all night, but she knew she has to speak to him. She cannot let his hopes rise high. The next day, she met him and instantly told him that even if she tries, this relationship cannot have a happy ending. She cannot and will not go against her parents' wishes.
Sanjay wasnt surprised, maybe he knew this was coming. He tried, tried very hard. Later in the evening, he called her again and begged to be with her and promised that if ever she decides to leave, he will let her go, without questioning twice.

Sumita opened her eyes.

What was Sanjay thinking? Was he so sure that his charisma will work so well on her that she will never leave?

She looked at the profile picture again. Oh! He was right, maybe partially. She did fall for his charisma, his love for small things, his passion for life, him in all.

The days were amazing. They were always together, always talking, holding hands, inseperable. They went trekking, they went to the seas, they were happy. Sumita was happy. She never felt so loved and never felt so special. And she loved him in return too. Sumita smiled when she thought of their first night together. Oh! It was so embarassing, but Sanjay made her feel so comfortable. She will never forget the look in his eyes. She knew he loved her to pieces.

Like Sumita said, she never went against her parents, she did not even mention his name to them. She knew how they would react and she was scared to disappoint them in an effort to be the perfect daughter. Convincing or rejecting Sanjay was hardly the most difficult thing. Sanjay kept quiet when Sumita told him about her prospective groom. But she could feel his anger, his disappointment, the heartbreak. Sanjay tried few times, but he knew he had promised to let her go.

Oh! Sanjay, you actually thought I will never leave.

Sumita wanted to cry, she wanted to talk to him, tell him she is sorry. She hardly had time to say goodbye. She closed her eyes again, feeling numb and so strange.

I did love him. I was happy with him. God, why do I still feel for him?

Sumita jolted up when the bell rang. She closed the laptop and rushed to the door to greet Mainak. The Draft section in her mailbox kept blinking her uncomposed mail.